Sorry

a pencil
a paper
no eraser
no picture

she smiled
as her pencil flew
across the paper
and created beauty

a bright face
a brighter thought
it couldn’t be erased
it couldn’t be captured

she frowned
at her mistake
and put down
her pencil

a lost expression
a lost soul
the drawing was her thought
the drawing was not her face

she cried
tore apart the paper
along with all
that kept her going

a given up hope
a forgotten dream
behind her shut mind
behind her shut eyes

a shred of paper
slipped from her fingers
which were now cold
“sorry”

Mind

I’m not always happy.

Even when I’m smiling

I’m not happy.

There’s something wrong.

Something isn’t right.

I don’t like this place,

But it’s my own mind.

It’s getting dark inside.

I need some light.

Where’s the air?

Why can’t I breathe?

I need something to hold.

I need someone.

Something’s not right.

That smile on my face,

It’s not mine.

Who’s is it?

See my truth.

Someone look through the mask.

Someone pull it aside.

Someone pull me out.

Help me escape.

Help me get out.

All I want

All I want is to talk,

But you want to tell me

About the explicit things

That you want to do to me.

All I want is to be seen

For the person that I am,

Not for my face or eyes

Or long legs that you like.

Al I want is to be loved

And to have friends

Who see me for who I am

Not for how I look.

All I want is to love

Without any lust,

Without hurting,

Or without getting hurt.

All I want is to be heard,

For my true voice to be let out,

But you won’t talk

Unless there’s something in it for you.

All I want is to be human,

But you want me to be

One of your possessions

That you keep on your arm.

The End.

she was still waiting
for a love that would never return
there was a fire blazing
in her heart

he silently wept
as he saw her weep
he wanted to hug her
and not just peep

they would never be together
it was not meant to be
it could never last forever
and so dreams were shattered

she was a rose
and her thorns were plenty
yet her beauty was such
it left him empty

she knew all about him
but would not say a word
and cared only for her vim
her lover to return

she was a breaker
and broke plenty of hearts
but they all ate up their sorrow
as if it was a tart

he thought to himself
and finally took a step
he went a bit too far
and reached for the shelf

he picked up what was his
and did what he had to
it took his life
and hers too

Sweater Weather

Have you seen her cry?
She doesn’t look ‘pretty’.
Her face is red,
and her eyes are puffy.

Have you seen her bleed?
She isn’t always okay.
Her blood is red,
and her hands tremble.

Have you seen her take off her mask?
She isn’t always happy.
Her eyes are sad too,
and her tears are real.

Have you seen her look perfect?
She doesn’t have to be.
Her beauty lies in imperfection,
and her scars show it.

But, have you seen her truly smile?
She doesn’t hide it.
Her smile is flawless,
and it’s like a thousand suns shining.

Have you heard her really laugh?
She doesn’t suppress it.
Her laugh is contagious,
and it’s fucking amazing.

Where?

Where, oh where, did my innocence go?
Is it that dark basement,
where you tried to grope
parts of me that hadn’t yet bloomed?

Where, oh where, did my softness go?
Is it in that ugly room,
where you manhandled me
in ways I didn’t know to exist?

Where, oh where, did my period go?
Is it in that school hallway,
where you sexually assaulted me
and had the authorities cover up?

Where, oh where, did my achievements go?
Are they in that little tube-well room,
where you sedated and molested me
because Daddy was running late?

Where, oh where, did my life go?
Is it in that temple,
where you hid me and raped me
because I was a girl and you a ‘man’?

Where, oh where, did your conscience go?
Is it in that womb,
where you were nurtured for nine months
so that you could become a rapist?

Where, oh where, did your control go?
Is it under that roof,
where your sister and mother seek you
to protect them, but you’re busy raping?

Where, oh where, did your heart go?
Is it in your ‘tool’,
where you’re waiting for it to be chopped
and fed to the dogs because you raped someone?

 

 

picture courtesy: Pinterest

No Reason

they told me i was over reacting
i was trying to express myself
they told me i was making a fuss
i held back another sob

they told me to behave
i didn’t want to listen
to their demands
when they chose to ignore mine

they told me not to shout
but how could i not
when every minute they spoke words
which stabbed my heart like stakes

they told me i couldn’t
so i didn’t
they told me to be me
but bound me in restrictions

they didn’t understand
how it felt to be crashing against rocks
through a storm they created
and trying to get out alive

they told me i wasn’t loved
then they chose to ignore me
and i needed to let out my frustration
so i spoke harmless words

they yelled at me for speaking
because other things were more important
while i suppressed another sob
and i hid away in the darkness

they pointed out my flaws
said i was a disappointment
didn’t listen to a word i had to say
and i sobbed in the bathroom

they didn’t hear
i didn’t let them hear
didn’t tell them out of fear
that they might yell at me some more

they want no reason
to be angry
so i will cut away
the one reason they have

The inside

Throw down your guns,
toss aside every bullet.
She doesn’t need your holes,
she feels hollow already.

Get rid of every sharp thing,
you’ve used at her.
She’s looking for them now,
she wants to slit her wrists.

All your words strtuck her,
in her heart like lightning.
They were like thunder,
to the scared girl inside.

Those flaws you saw on her skin,
they’re reflections of your own.
She’s always been flawless,
she thinks otherwise, though.

Everything you said or did,
might not have been visible to your eyes.
She knows she’s not okay,
she has scars on the inside of her.

“hang on.”

“hang on”
i said
“to what?”
he asked

“keep going”
i told him
“Alright”
he replied

“you can”
i tried
“hopefully”
he didn’t believe

and today,
he said those words
to me
but i didn’t reply

And today
my thoughts overpowered me
i didn’t react
i didn’t care

“hang on”
“keep going”
“you can”
but i couldn’t

nothing to hang onto
nothing to keep going for
i didn’t see another way
I’m sorry it happened

i stopped caring
long ago
but now
i stopped feeling too

text showed up
on a lit screen
never to find a reply,
my fingers were cold.

A WordPress.com Website.

Up ↑